Authenticity

Do you ever crave your own authenticity?

Do you ever just take a bath because it is nice to be clean instead of 'get ready' for whatever your activities are for the day?

Do you ever just take your shoes off to feel the ground?

Do you ever need more color in your life? Or less color?

Do you ever just wonder what you could do if so many commitments were not dividing you in half like a division problem?

Do you ever wonder if the day was completely, I mean COMPLETELY up to you what you would really do with your time and energy?

Do you ever wonder and dream of another you? The one who lives, instead of exists?

Do you ever wonder why you compromise yourself into so many little decisions that swallow the day?

Do you ever just want to pull cord on the parachute and just head another direction? Sail to the seven seas?

I do.

But then, someone in my life needs me.
They need me at the door when they come back.
They need me for one last kiss before they trust sleep to come catch them finally.

They need me to stay.

They need me to hold ,for them, their unnamed craving for their own authenticity until they know its there.
They need me to help them name it and seek it and dream about it.

I'm needed and I suppose that is the most authentic piece of my puzzle. For now, I am content to seek authenticity here, with them.One day its going to come for me and I will be.....ready. For now I am going to live in a beige house on a culdesac and lead the way for them... Eventually, I will pull my shoes off, sit "Indian Style" in my skirt, throw my 'make up' in the trash, let my hair go seaweed wild, and paint my house in swirls instead of straight lines.