Besides feeling like I am 10 years old on the tether ball court with a broken rim and shattered glass on the playground, I have many a 'beef' with having to wear glasses.
1. I just walked in from the bus stop and as I passed the hallway mirror, noticed some 'goopy' sand in the corners of my eyes that I did not notice before I left. Ewww, to every conversation with me at the bus stop today! Doesn't she know there are eye boogs in there! Nope, she did not.
2. When it rains, which it NEVER ( tongue in cheek) does in Seattle, I simply cannot see!!! No windshield wipers here, baby.
3. When I am trying to put makeup on, I CANNOT SEE!!!! How is one to make their face more becoming when you cannot even see what is going to be put on your eyes....??? There is an enigmatic guess as to where my eyelashes even are!
4. They simply do not work at all when exercising! I hate sweaty sliding glasses.
5. I cannot open a hot dishwasher without waiting for my glasses to clear before I can even see the dishes I am looking for.
6. They just don't match some outfits. Black glasses with anything floral, just does not suit my sensibilities.
7. They are annoying when I am trying to read in bed, always slanting and pinching behind my ear.
8. AND, in general, I just feel ugly when I wear them.
9. Why did God create the nearsighted? Purpose? Is there symbolism in the blurry?
10. And finally, as I end this beefy rant..... They totally get in the way when I am trying to make out with Marc Reeves!!! This is the cruelest of all. "Oh, sorry honey, I thought those were your lips"......
